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When does drinking too much tip into addiction?

When Does Drinking Too Much Tip Into Addiction?

You don’t have to drink a bottle of vodka at breakfast and land in the gutter by lunchtime to have addiction issues. Addiction to alcohol can creep up on you. Anyone from any walk of life – young, old, rich, poor – can be susceptible to alcohol dependency.

Most people who drink alcohol regularly tend to consume way over the recommended units per week – which is now set by the NHS at 14 units for men and women. Units were initially measured years ago when wine and beer had lower alcohol content. Yet these days it can be difficult to calculate just how many units you’re actually consuming when you have a standard 125ml glass of wine in an upmarket restaurant. In bars, too, they’ll ask if you want a small (175ml) or large (250ml) glass – and while there are on average 10 units in a bottle of wine, it can be hard to keep track of your units when you don’t know how strong the wine is. If you’re curious to know your units and the impact they’re having on your life, Alcohol Concern offers a helpful Unit Calculator.

So, how can you tell if you’re just a heavy drinker who enjoys a few nights out, or whether you’re becoming addicted to alcohol?

Addiction as a term can include alcohol dependency and alcohol abuse. Dependency tends to be habitual drinkers: they tend to crave alcohol every day, and might have a couple of glasses of wine with dinner. If you get into the habit of doing this without thinking, and really miss that glass of wine if you don’t have it, then you could be alcohol dependent. The drinker who abuses alcohol tends to be a binge drinker. This could be every Friday night, or even once a month, when they go out with the intention to knock back beers and shots and get drunk.

If you can’t imagine life without alcohol, or if you start planning your week around when you’re going to have a drink, then this is a sign that your social drinking may be developing into something more serious.

If you’re always the first one to the bar – and when you finish your first drink you’re already craving another – then this is another sign that your relationship with alcohol may not be healthy.

If you wake up in the morning with a terrible hangover, swearing that you will never drink again – and then find yourself down the pub at lunchtime for a ‘hair of the dog’ – that is a sign that alcohol is starting to take control of you, rather than the other way round.

Some people don’t know when or how to stop, even when aspects of their lives begin to unravel. They may choose alcohol over other commitments – such as family, work and relationships – and they may not take responsibility for these roles and instead choose to keep drinking. There’s a good old saying if alcohol costs you more than money then you have a problem.

Problem drinkers may aim to manage their drinking so they’re only consuming alcohol two or three days a week, and the other days they’re dry. Addicts would struggle with this as for many it is all or nothing. However, addicts can stop once they make a decision to become abstinent – and stick to it. However, managing their recovery can be a challenge if they’re struggling with not drinking, and some people do end up relapsing.

Addiction Issues

Addiction issues often do not work in isolation. Addicts will be dependent on another substance or behaviour, which could be food, drugs, sex, shopping, or a combination of many things. Even when people abstain from drinking, their addiction may manifest elsewhere, such as extreme dieting, compulsive gym-going, overworking, or obsessing over someone they’re in relationship with. If you’re struggling with one or more compulsions and need help in managing them, we offer professional addiction counselling services with leading psychotherapists.

Sometimes people can be creative, smart and successful. But when obsession kicks in they can become addicted, anxious and depressed. Alcoholism is progressive. It can sneak up on you. Staying aware of how much you drink and how you feel about alcohol can keep you on track.

If you think about alcohol every day then it becomes an obsession. The effects of alcoholism can also spill into close relationships, too. The ups and downs of an alcoholic’s life can be played out in dramatic arguments and other destructive behaviours in a relationship. Being with an addict can feel like an emotional rollercoaster, from anger to impotence to needing to rescue – all of which can add up to co-dependency, which in itself is a form of addiction.

If you feel you have an issue with alcohol and are struggling to manage, you may find that talking to someone can help feel more able to cope and make decisions about what happens next. If you decide to give up alcohol and want a life of sobriety, AA is a route that many choose, and there are multiple meetings every day all over the country.

If you feel you would like some support not just with alcohol but with underlying issues too, then therapy could be an option for you. We have a team of addiction counsellors who will be able to help. Just call 020 8673 4545 or email [email protected] for a confidential appointment.

 

Michaela McCarthy
Michaela McCarthy
Michaela McCarthy is the CEO of TAC. She is a qualified and accredited Counsellor, Psychotherapist, Psychosexual & Relationship Therapist and Addictions Specialist with more than 20 years’ experience.
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Baby Loss Awareness Week exists to help grow awareness and support for people who’ve lost a baby, as well as allowing grieving parents across the globe to commemorate their babies whose lives were heartbreakingly short. Many people who’ve lost a baby say they never truly get over it. Ever. A part of them will remain forever empty. Even future babies, if they come along, will never fill that gap. The loss of a baby can be devastating, whatever stage of pregnancy the couple are at – whether it’s a miscarriage (before 24 weeks), a stillbirth (after 24 weeks) or losing the baby during or after birth. Losing a baby at any stage is shocking and traumatic for the parents. A multitude of painful feelings can crowd in. Life may feel thin, sad, empty, pointless. If you know someone who’s lost a baby, it can be difficult to know what to do for the best. Nothing can take away their pain, though it might help you to understand the kind of things your friend or loved one is going through. What it’s like to live with baby loss • The parents have lost a person they thought they would spend the rest of their lives with. Not only have they lost a baby, they’ve lost the hopes and dreams of a cherished future. • It’s a bereavement that can feel just as raw as if the baby had grown up and lived a longer life. • There often isn’t much after-care in hospital, following the loss of a baby, and so the parents may be feeling abandoned and all at sea. • Some of the clinical terms used when a mother miscarries can be quite upsetting. These terms can feel depersonalising and hurtful, even though it’s just medical professionals doing their job. • Losing a baby can leave a mother feeling like a failure, as if she’s done something wrong. These feelings of guilt and self-doubt can sometimes develop into depression. • Grieving parents can feel very, very alone in their loss. No one truly understands the pain they’re going through. • They don’t want to take care of your reaction when they tell you what’s happened. Sometimes people can get so upset about the news that the bereaved parents end up taking care of the feelings of others. It’s not meant to work that way. • It can become unbearable to see other people pregnant or with babies – especially people close to them. What’s worse is people not telling them they’re pregnant, for fear of upsetting them. • The loss can sometimes affect the parents’ relationship as the partners struggle to come to terms with the loss individually and together. • Months and sometimes years down the line, they may still be mourning the baby they lost. How you can support someone through baby loss Acknowledge their loss. This is one of the toughest things for grieving parents: when people around them don’t know what to say, and so act as though nothing has happened. They want their loss to be acknowledged. Don’t let your awkwardness get in the way of that. Avoid clichés. Don’t just trot out the typical things people might say that they think will make the bereaved parents feel better – like, “oh, your baby is too good for earth and has gone to heaven,” or “well, you’ll be able to have another one soon”. That kind of phrase really doesn’t help. They want a human being in front of them who cares and who really doesn’t need to say anything – just be there. Let them talk. Losing a baby can be a lonely time. Your loved one may feel as though no one understands. Even if you don’t truly understand (and you won’t unless you’ve been through it yourself) be there with a sympathetic and caring ear. Keep your own emotions in check. They’re the ones suffering, not you. Don’t break down and make them the ones to look after you. They need your support. You can show your sadness. Of course. But you may need to be the strong one while they’re feeling vulnerable. Be sensitive to when they might need an ally. It can be hard to be around other people with babies and bumps when you’ve lost a baby. Tears can threaten at any point. Keep an eye out for when your loved one might need you to cover for them in a social gathering. Help create a socially acceptable excuse when they need a moment by themselves. Urge them to stay off social media. Facebook, Instagram etc – by their nature – showcase shiny happy people doing shiny happy things. Life events such as pregnancy and babies are often catalogued in minute detail. Especially in the early stages, it may feel healthier and safer for your friend or loved one who’s lost a baby to give social media a miss. Until they feel strong enough to engage again without breaking down. Keep an eye on their mental health. Painful emotions do pass, generally. Sometimes they don’t, especially if there are some underlying issues from earlier in life. A new loss can tap into earlier losses, with compound effect. If your friend of loved one is showing signs of tipping into depression then you may want to suggest they see a therapist who can support them through the darkness – until they’re ready to walk into the light again. For confidential support from one of our therapists, you can book an appointment by emailing appointments@theawarenesscentre.com or calling 020 8673 4545.

How To Support Someone Who’s Lost A Baby

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    The Awareness Centre Training School

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    TAC Training School offers comprehensive training in counselling and clinical supervision, including a BACP-accredited Diploma in Counselling. We provide a clear pathway from foundation-level courses to advanced diplomas, equipping you with the knowledge, skills, and confidence to integrate theory into practice.

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    With training centres in Clapham (SW4), Nine Elms (SW8) and Tooting (SW17), TAC Training School is renowned for its outstanding tutors, who deliver high-quality, supportive teaching to both aspiring and experienced therapy practitioners.

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